Come On & Join Us - Lanai
By Maui Curmudgeon

This is the 2nd in a 7-part series of Maui Curmudgeon’s Hawaiian Islands Tour.

Depending on whom you believe, about 95% to 97% of Lanai is owned by one company – Castle & Cooke – which is owned by one family, the Murdochs. The island has a population of about 3,500, many, many of whom are dirt poor.

How poor? When a program to help teach people how to grow their own food in their own backyards went to Lanai, several residents told them it wouldn’t work because lots of people didn’t even have enough money to buy hoses to water the garden. That’s poor.

Still, What makes Lanai worth visiting:

First, take the ferry from Maui, don’t be a pussy and fly in. The ferry ride is short, sweet and an experience, and during the five months whales are here, is a free way to encounter them.

You can’t rent a car at the harbor, but you don’t need one. For $10 you can use the island bus all day.

Visit Lanai City, walk around Dole Park. If you do nothing else, eat at the Blue Ginger Cafe, and visit Dis N Dat, the weirdest store you might ever shop.

Walk the beach near Manele Bay. It’s a breathtaking spot.

No need to stay the night but if you do:

Stay in town rather cheaply at the Hotel Lanai, which, far from resembling an old plantation house, feels like a New England Inn.

If you’ve got money to spend, take at night at Manele Bay, a Four Seasons resort where everything is just amazingly wonderful. If you can’t relax here you can’t relax, period.

Avoid Kohele, unless you’re a golfer, in which case we hope you lose all your balls. We mean it.

Next up: Molokai.